Just starving myself.
I’m not usually the type of person to resort to social media as my private diary where I express my deepest thoughts. However, tumblr is my savior and I had to get this one off of my chest.
I do date a lovely fellow who is in the army. I do not blatantly call myself an army girlfriend. (And I know i’ll be getting a lot of shit for this post afterwards but words from others I don’t know mean nothing! right?). I do not ask him for dog tags or those cliche ”army girlfriend” gifts from etsy.com. Why? I’m not the one in the army. I’m a college student. An art major. It would be a sweet gesture if he bought me dog tags as a gift as a complete surprise out of the kindess of his heart, but i’m not asking for them.I am just this normal college girl who happened to fall in love with a guy who made me happy, regardless of his ACU’s. I fell in love with a person I could be myself around, who I could lay in bed and watch netflix with literally all day. In reality, this is just another long distance relationship. However, his profession is dangerous and there comes a time when he might not make it home. I get that. I feel like it’s a new trend for girls to have an “army boyfriend”, a big pity party for you since you can’t see your man every day, just another reason for you to grasp the most attention you possibly can. It’s like people these days love to glorify pain. I absolutely hate when people watch youtube “coming home” videos and sit there screaming “OMG that’s what I want! I want a guy like that!”. No. You should not want a guy just because of his profession or because you just want a youtube video that reaches a thousand views. Those videos show the happiest moment a family has probably had in months. They do not show how horrible it is to sit there every day and wait to hear from your loved one. Just to make sure they’re okay. When the time comes and my boy gets deployed and he finally comes home, I won’t have someone record it. And if a family member does, I won’t post it on social media. That’s mine and my boyfriend’s personal moment. No one else’s. I don’t want a video just for attention.
Most girls claim to wear crazy accessories plastered with “Army girlfriend!” because they are proud of their significant other. (They make cute accessories when he finally comes back from deployment, though!). I mean, don’t get me wrong, that’s fantastic that you’re there for your man. If you didn’t like what he did for a living, I highly doubt you’d be in this relationship, anyways. It takes a lot of patience to be with someone that you cannot physically see anytime you want.
Which leads into my next point. Distance is distance. Time apart is time apart. I was lucky to meet a guy who lives on an army base two hours away from me and where I attend college. (I can already feel the eyes of the people who have thousands of miles between them and their guy glaring at me). On average, I only see him for two days every month. If i’m lucky. I have studying and homework, he has, well, army stuff to do. That sounds like heaven to most girls, I know. Most would kill to have that. However, it is perfectly not okay to bash others for saying they miss their significant other every once in a while. like I said, distance is distance. Unless he’s not right next to you or in walking distance, you feel incomplete and a tad lonely sometimes. You might get a bit (or extremely) jealous of couples who see each other every day and then still complain, but everyone’s situation is different. All of us can feel for each other when it comes to missing someone you love. The hours, days, weeks, and miles do not matter. I miss my boyfriend the day after I leave him just as much as I do the day before I get to see him again. This is not a contest to see who has it worse, to see who has more of a long distance relationship than the other. There are people who have it worse than I do, and then there are people who have it a whole lot better than I do. But, for the last time please stop making it a contest. It does not matter. I’m sure we can all agree when I say that it isn’t the time apart that matters, it’s the time together that matters more than anything else. And I sure as hell know that we all appreciate and cherish the hell out of that time together. Of course there are those couples who get to see each other every single day, but eventually, deployment will hit and you’ll have distance between you two. It’ll turn into a long distance relationship.
If you read all of this, kudos. If you want to form a mob and hunt me down with pitchforks and fire on sticks, well, then i’ll just assume you took what I said too much to heart and you might have to reevaluate your lifestyle. This is my opinion, and in no way, shape, or form, am I shoving my thoughts down your throat.
don’t let tumblr make you believe that
-smoking is cool
-being a narcissistic bitch is acceptable
-trusting nobody is healthy
-starving yourself will make you beautiful
-hating everybody is okay
- that working hard for grades isn’t worth the time
- that having mental health condition is a perk
- that self harm should be romanticized
- that abusive and codependent relationships are cute
- that not being in a minority makes you any less of a person